You got to laugh at this..

This is not a political joke. This is an email forwarded to me (source unknown) containing an essay about the bible, written by a child (age unknown). The misinterpretation of events, names and words is funny. Let’s have a good laugh. We all need some happiness in today’s unhappy world.

The Children’s Bible in a Nutshell

In the beginning, which occurred near the start, there was nothing but God, darkness, and some gas. The Bible says, ‘The Lord thy God is one, but I think He must be a lot older than that.

Anyway, God said, ‘Give me a light!’ and someone did.

Then God made the world.

He split the Adam and made Eve. Adam and Eve were naked, but they weren’t embarrassed because mirrors hadn’t been invented yet.

Adam and Eve disobeyed God by eating one bad apple, so they were driven from the Garden of Eden…..Not sure what they were driven in though, because they didn’t have cars.

Adam and Eve had a son, Cain, who hated his brother as long as he was Abel.

Pretty soon all of the early people died off, except for Methuselah, who lived to be like a million or something.

One of the next important people was Noah, who was a good guy, but one of his kids was kind of a Ham. Noah built a large boat and put his family and some animals on it He asked some other people to join him, but they said they would have to take a rain check.

After Noah came Abraham, Isaac, and Jacob. Jacob was more famous than his brother, Esau, because Esau sold Jacob his birthmark in exchange for some pot roast. Jacob had a son named Joseph who wore a really loud sports coat.

Another important Bible guy is Moses, whose real name was Charlton Heston. Moses led the Israel Lights out of Egypt and away from the evil Pharaoh after God sent ten plagues on Pharaoh’s people. These plagues included frogs, mice, lice, bowels, and no cable.

God fed the Israel Lights every day with manicotti. Then he gave them His Top Ten Commandments. These include: don’t lie, cheat, smoke, dance, or covet your neighbor’s stuff.

Oh, yeah, I just thought of one more: Humor thy father and thy mother.

One of Moses’ best helpers was Joshua who was the first Bible guy to use spies. Joshua fought the battle of Geritol and the fence fell over on the town.

After Joshua came David. He got to be king by killing a giant with a slingshot. He had a son named Solomon who had about 300 wives and 500 porcupines. My teacher says he was wise, but that doesn’t sound very wise to me.

After Solomon there were a bunch of major league prophets. One of these was Jonah, who was swallowed by a big whale and then barfed up on the shore.

There were also some minor league prophets, but I guess we don’t have to worry about them.

After the Old Testament came the New Testament. Jesus is the star of The New. He was born in Bethlehem in a barn. (I wish I had been born in a barn too, because my mom is always saying to me, ‘Close the door! Were you born in a barn?’ It would be nice to say, ‘As a matter of fact, I was.’)

During His life, Jesus had many arguments with sinners like the Pharisees and the Democrats.

Jesus also had twelve opossums.

The worst one was Judas Asparagus. Judas was so evil that they named a terrible vegetable after him.

Jesus was a great man. He healed many leopards and even preached to some Germans on the Mount.

But the Democrats and all those guys put Jesus on trial before Pontius the Pilot. Pilot didn’t stick up for Jesus. He just washed his hands instead..

Anyways, Jesus died for our sins, then came back to life again. He went up to Heaven but will be back at the end of the Aluminum. His return is foretold in the book of Revolution.

Oh no, not again!

This is not a laughing matter!

On one hand, the ministers are asking Malaysians to live like a pauper. On the other hand they are INCREASING THE TOLL RATES AGAIN!

Toll hike for 5 highways on Sunday

Feb 26, 09 12:17pm

The toll rates for five highways – North-South Expressway (Plus), Sprint Highway (Sprint), Ampang Elevated Highway (Akleh), Sungai Besi Highway (Besraya), New Pantai Expressway (NEP) – will go up this Sunday. MCPX Beginning March 1, road users for Plus will be paying an extra 0.86 sen per kilometre – from 13.60 sen per km to 14.46 sen per km – a hike of 6.3 percent. The following are the new rates for the other highways: Sprint Highway Pantai toll plaza – up 50 sen from RM1.50 to RM2 (increase of 33%) Damansara toll plaza – up 30 sen from RM1 to RM1.30 (increase of 30%) Ampang Elevated Highway Up 50 sen from RM1.50 to RM2 (an increase of 33%) Sungai Besi Highway Up 10 sen from RM1.30 to RM1.40 (an increase of 7.7%) New Pantai Expressway Up 40 sen from RM1.60 to RM2 (an increase of 25%)

(source: Malaysiakini)

This means I will have to fork out an extra RM3.50 for my return trip to Ipoh weekly! Currently I pay RM25.70. With the toll hike, I will have to pay something like RM27.40! Not forgetting having to pay higher toll for inner city travel too.

I am already cooking all my meals and not eating out, just to scrimp and save that few ringgit. Today a visit to the doctor set me back by RM130.

Don’t forget that instead of getting a pay rise, most people are either getting a pay-cut or a kick off the job!

We don’t need this inconsiderate action from the government at such a time when we are struggling to keep our jobs. Although I know that it may be in accordance with the agreement with highway concessionaires, but can’t the government consider the current situation properly, defer the increase for a while more.. at least until the RM7 billion stimulus package has stimulated a more robust economy first!

The government is adding burden to us with their idiotic decisions and actions!

How much is a Billion?

We have read of governments spending billions in rescue or stimulus packages to save their country’s economy. Our Malaysian government also announced a RM7 billion stimulus package for the same purpose.

But how much is a billion?

This is an email I received, which gives us a wee bit idea how much a billion is..

The next time you hear a politician use the word “billion” casually think about whether you do, or don’t, want that politician spending your tax money!!

A billion is a difficult number to comprehend, but an advertising agency did a good job of putting that figure in perspective in one of its releases:

A billion seconds ago, it was 1959.

A billion minutes ago, Jesus was alive.

A billion hours ago, our ancestors were living in the Stone Age.

And….

A billion dollars ago, was only 8 hours and 20 minutes at the rate the Federal government spends

Are we glad or are we not glad that the RM7 billion stimulus package is taking so long to be spend? Instead of the 58 hours 20 minutes supposedly to spend 7 billion dollars? (This is not a trick question, I think either way, it’s not good!).

Of cows and governments..

A SOCIALIST: You have two cows. The government takes one and gives it to your neighbor.

A COMMUNIST: You have two cows. The government seizes both and provides you with milk.

A FASCIST: You have two cows. The government seizes both and sells you the milk. You join the underground and start a campaign of sabotage.

DEMOCRATIC: You have two cows. The government taxes you to the point you have to sell both to support a man in a foreign country who has only one cow, which was a gift from your government.

CAPITALISM: You have two cows. You sell one, buy a bull, and build a herd of cows.

*****************************************************

AMERICAN : You have two cows. You sell one, and force the other to produce the milk of four cows. You are surprised when the cow drops dead.

FRENCH : You have two cows. You go on strike because you want three cows.

BRITISH : You have two cows. They are mad. They die. Pass the shepherd’s pie, please.

RUSSIAN : You have two cows. You count them and learn you have five cows. You count them again and learn you have 42 cows. You count them again and learn you have 12 cows. You stop counting cows and open another bottle of vodka.

SWISS : You have 5000 cows, none of which belong to you. You charge others for storing them.

INDIAN : You have two cows. You worship both of them.

CHINESE : You have two cows. You have 300 people milking them. You claim full employment, high bovine productivity, and arrest the newsman who reported on them.

JAPANESE : You have two cows. You redesign them so they are one-tenth the size of an ordinary cow and produce twenty times the milk. You then create clever cow cartoon images called Cowkimon and market them World-Wide.

MALAYSIAN : You have two cows. You sell two to your crony for half the market price. Then your crony sells it to the public for 100x the market price, and shares the profit with you.

(peng’s note: peng made up the Malaysian part… )

source of the rest: Political Humor

Is he talking to the wall?

In his speech at the launch of the ’sparkling brand new’ MACC (Malaysian Anti-Corruption Commission), the Prime Minister urged the MACC to be
truly professional.

“In that sense, your conduct, while on duty or even off duty, must always be beyond reproach and in conformity with the laws of the land.”

These are indeed inspiring and encouraging words.

But then, does the MACC chief hears and shares his views? The chief, by issuing a statement saying that ‘there was strong and good evidence’ against Selangor Menteri Besar in alleged wrongdoing in the maintenance of a luxury car and purchase of sacrificial cows is obviously unprofessional. He is making a prejudgment that the Selangor Menteri Besar is guilty even before he is charged!

To side track a little, here is one brilliant insight written by Khalid Samad for The Malaysian Insider.

‘Selangorians should therefore read this as an ‘implied’ clean slate for the current administration. As, if there were genuine cases of corruption, I am sure they would have been presented as they have sufficient inducement and complete freedom to do so.

It would have been a different story if the ACA, as it was known then, had shown the same commitment and motivation during the years of Khir Toyo. That would have been more akin to the finding of the ‘pot of gold at the end of the rainbow’.

Secondly, this whole process should leave no doubt in ones mind that the BN Government uses the government institutions for their own political benefit. They have no commitment to the question of good governance or the principles of truth or justice.’

Is the MACC chief above the laws of this land, that he could make such an accusing statement and expect the public to see him as impartial?

There have been countless reports made against corrupted politicians and public service officers. Why is it the MACC or the always defunct ACA only took action against the smaller fries?

Is this impartiality and fairness?

I think Mr. Prime Minister, you are talking to the wall.

And for that matter, A VERY THICK WALL!!

Of mindless matters!

We are living in a dysfuntional country!

This Monday morning, I am going to rant about some local mindless matters reported by the news media.

One-year-old baby molested

This is really mindless! A mother found blood stains on her one-year-old baby’s private parts. Doctor informed baby’s parents of penetration wounds in the baby’s private part and anus, were both old and fresh ones. Sickening and despicable! The person who did this is a mindless criminal! (source: The Star)

Women first to be retrenched

Deputy Women, Family and Community Development Minister revealed that half of the workers retrenched recently in the current economic crisis were women, despite them making up only 35% of the country’s total workforce. And I ask.. women do not need to survive this economic downturn? Women do not need to eat? Women do not need a roof over her head? All women has a man to take care of her? There are no single women mothers with children to care for? There are no single women daughters with elderly parents to care for? What a mindless discrimination! (source: The Star)

Perak Tussle: Umno seeks QC’s opinion

Zambry and his six “suspended” state executive council members are seeking a second opinion from a Queen’s Counsel (QC) in London on the constitutional impasse in the state. One of the assemblymen and other lawyers are also expected to go. Firstly, they discredit or  ‘look down on’ the local experts on this matter, secondly, the DPM is admitting that projected growth is now not realistic and yet they have so much money to send a team to London! Oh I see, not your money, it’s the taxpayers money! Ha! Ha! Ha! This is mindless-ly hilarious and absurd! (source: Malaysiakini)

Sime Darby lacks funds: LCCT at Labu off

The Deputy Prime Minister said the project would not be carried out as Sime Darby Berhad had no funds to initiate the infrastructure. I just don’t understand the on-off-off deliberation on this issue. Hey! Don’t the government realize that there are more pressing issues than deliberating on whether Sime Darby has the funds to build a low cost airport, which in the first place was approved and endorsed by the DPM! What a mindless waste of time! (source: The Star)

Chinese school may suffer from BN-Pakatan feud

A government-assisted Chinese primary school in Puchong, Selangor, may fall victim to the vicious ongoing feud between Barisan Nasional and Pakatan Rakyat… just because The SJK(C) Sin Ming school board had invited PKR’s Khalid Ibrahim, in his capacity as Selangor menteri besar, to officiate the school’s new four-storey building today. This apparently did not go down well with the Education Ministry. Hey! This is not funny at all! If you politicians want to fight, fight by all means. Don’t get the rakyat involved! Don’t you mess with our economy, education, healthcare and safety! What mindless politicians we have! (source: Malaysiakini)

A Baking Sunday (6)

It’s been quite awhile since I posted a baking post. Today, I got ‘rajin’ and decided to do some baking. I love baking, but I detest the cleaning up part. That’s why I have not been baking for awhile…

I went into baking over-drive, baked 2 banana almond cakes and 2 butter cakes!

The mess that I have to clean up later...

Banana almond loaf cake. Don't it look kind of burnt?

The banana almond loaf cut into slices..

I baked some butter cakes too. It would have tasted great with some orange rind and juice..

Some slices of the butter cake..hmmm..rich buttery taste!

Something is rotten…

Political-related events that happened in Malaysia over the past weeks of 2009 qualify a place in the Guinness Book of World Records. Things, happened at such an alarming speed, as if someone is chasing to meet a deadline.

First, we have the traitorous defections in Perak which set off a round of actions and reactions.

Then, one female Member of Parliament privacy was breached with the illegal circulation of her pictures.

Now, the ’suddenly quick-to-act and efficient’ MACC prepares to charge the Selangor Menteri Besar over some cows and a car!

Here is an article written by a former Court of Appeal judge. I have pasted it in full for those who do not subscribe to Malaysiakini.

I will leave you to conclude if things are indeed rotten….

Sultan has no powers to ask Nizar to quit

NH Chan | Feb 20, 09 12:45pm

According to the Perak constitution, the ruler has a personal discretion in the performance of two functions – the appointment of a menteri besar and the withholding of consent to a request for the dissolution of the legislative assembly.

On Feb 4, Mohd Nizar Jamaluddin, the mentri besar, was granted an audience by the sultan to request for the ruler’s consent to dissolve the Perak State Assembly.

The next day, Deputy Prime Minister Najib Abdul Razak also requested for an audience with the sultan as the Perak BN chief and consent was granted for him to present himself before the ruler.

This is the account given in the Star, Feb 6:

“The four-page statement, signed by the sultan’s private secretary, Col Abdul Rahim Mohamad Nor, was issued at 2.15pm, Feb 5.

“It said Mohd Nizar had an audience with the sultan yesterday to seek the ruler’s consent to dissolve the state assembly. Earlier in the day, Najib, who is Perak Barisan chairman, had an audience with the sultan twice.

“At the audience in the morning, he informed the ruler that BN and its supporters now had the majority in the state assembly. The statement said the sultan had summoned all the 31 assemblymen before him to verify the information.

“‘His Royal Highness had used his discretion under Article XWI (2)(b) of the Perak Darul Ridzuan State Constitution and did not consent to the dissolution of the Perak State Assembly,’ the statement added.”

Bernama later reported that Mohd Nizar was summoned to an audience to be informed of the sultan’s decision not to dissolve the state government.

Now what is wrong with that?

It is wrong because the sultan saw Najib without Mohd Nizar being present. Let me explain why it is improper for him to do that.

A fatal error

As a former Lord President, who was then the highest judge in the country, the sultan should know that it is improper to see an interested party alone without the other side being present before announcing his decision.

It was only after the ruler had seen Najib that he summoned Nizar to inform him that he had decided not to dissolve the legislative assembly.

That was his undoing. It was a fatal error. This is not a case of natural justice where both sides have a right to be heard. There was no hearing.

This was a request by a menteri besar to his sultan to dissolve the legislative assembly where, by the very fact of the application itself, he has admitted that he no longer commands the confidence of the majority in the assembly.

In other words, it is a request under Article XVI, Clause (6) of the Perak constitution. To such a request, the ruler has a personal discretion not to grant it under Article XVIII, Clause (2) (b).

The personal discretion to grant or not to grant must be exercised without any suggestion or suspicion to any reasonable outsider that he was partial to one political party or coalition of parties.

In other words, it is about the appearance of impartiality – justice should not only be done, but should be seen to be done.

And in the present context, what is the right thing to do?

Every judge, unless he is a bad judge, knows that the right thing to do is to apply the oft-repeated saying of Lord Chief Justice Hewart in R v. Sussex Justices, ex parte McCarthy: “It is not merely of some importance, but is of fundamental importance that justice should not only be done, but should manifestly and undoubtedly be seen to be done”.

As Lord Denning would have put it in Metropolitan Properties Co (FGC) Ltd v. Lannon [I9691 1 Q.B. 577: “The court will not inquire whether he did in fact, favour one side unfairly. Suffice it that reasonable people might think he did. The reason is plain enough. Justice must be rooted in confidence: and confidence is destroyed when right-minded people go away thinking: ‘The judge was biased’.”

When perception matters most

Now we know why the people of Perak and elsewhere in Malaysia, are making harsh statements about the sultan. A quick search on the Internet will prove this.

It is the perception of the people that matters; and the confidence of the people is destroyed when they go away thinking that he was biased – that he had been influenced by Najib.

It is very sad that Sultan Azlan Shah, who had been held in high esteem internationally and by the populace, has, in a careless moment, lost all that.

His reputation for fairness and justice has been shattered when they go away thinking that he had been influenced by Najib or that he has favoured BN. It does not matter whether he did, in fact, favour one side unfairly.

Suffice it that reasonable people might think that he did. The die is cast and we cannot put the clock back. Hereafter, there may be many who will no longer believe in his speeches on good governance and the integrity of the judiciary.

The impression is that he does not practise what he preaches.

When the menteri besar ceases to command the confidence of the majority of the members of the legislative assembly, he has two choices.

First, he may request the ruler to dissolve the assembly for the purpose of a state election. Second, if his request is turned down by the ruler, “he shall tender the resignation of the executive council”.

This is provided in Article XVI, Clause (6) which reads: “(6) if the Mentri Besar ceases to command the confidence of the majority of the members of the Legislative Assembly, then unless at his request His Royal Highness dissolves the Legislative Assembly, he shall tender the resignation of the Executive Council.”

What Article XVI, Clause (6) says is this: If the menteri besar ceases to command the confidence of the majority of the legislative assembly, he shall tender the resignation of the executive council, unless the ruler has, at the request of the menteri besar, dissolved the legislative assembly.

However, in the present case, Mohd Nizar on Feb 4, had requested the ruler to dissolve the legislative assembly, and the ruler informed him on Feb 5 that he acted in his discretion to withhold his consent for the dissolution of the assembly.

That being the case, the menteri besar has no other choice but to tender the resignation of the executive council.

Cannot declare MB post vacant

Under Article XWI, Clause (2), paragraph (b), the ruler has a personal discretion to withhold his consent to the menteri besar’s request for the dissolution of the legislative assembly.

Unfortunately, the ruler, in the present case, has acted unconstitutionally when he sidestepped the constitutional provisions of Article XVI, Clause (6) of the laws of the Perak constitution.

This was what he did.

The Sultan of Perak’s media statement said: “Mohd Nizar was summoned to an audience with the sultan to be informed of the ruler’s decision not to dissolve the State Assembly, and in accordance with the provisions of Article XVI (6) of the Perak Darul Ridzuan State Constitution, the Sultan of Perak ordered Mohd Nizar to resign from his post as Perak menteri besar together with the members of the state executive council with immediate effect.

“If Mohd Nizar does not resign from his post as Perak menteri besar together with the state executive council members, then the posts of menteri besar and state executive councillors are regarded as vacant.”

As we know the sultan is a constitutional monarch who has no power to rule except a couple of discretionary powers mentioned in Article XVIII, Clause (2).

So, apart from the couple of matters mentioned in Article XVIII, Clause (2), the Sultan of Perak has no power to order Mohd Nizar to resign from his post as Perak menteri besar together with the members of the state executive council with immediate effect.

Nor has he the power to declare that the posts of menteri besar and state executive councillors are regarded as vacant.

In the present case, the mentri besar had acted under Article XVI, Clause (6) which permitted him to request the ruler to dissolve the legislative assembly if he ceased to command the confidence of the majority of the members of the legislative assembly.

In this case, the ruler turned down his request. Then the menteri besar has no choice but “to tender the resignation of the executive council”.

So, why did the ruler, in the present case, depart from the provisions of Article XVI, Clause (6)?

Under the provisions of Clause (6), the sultan knew that the ball was in the menteri besar’s court and it was to be the mentri besar who “should tender the resignation of the executive council”.

Yet he chose to ignore these provisions of the Perak constitution.

A pretended show of power

The ruler has defied the provisions of Article XVI, Clause (6) when he resorted to ordering the menteri besar to resign from his post when he has no power to do so.

The sultan knew, or he ought to have known, that under Article XWI, Clause (2) (a) the menteri besar is appointed by the sultan from the members of the legislative assembly “who in his judgment is likely to command the confidence of the majority of the members of the Assembly”.

This is what Article XVI, Clause (2) says: “(2) The Executive Council shall be appointed as follows, that is to say – (a) His Royal Highness shall first appoint as menteri besar to preside over the Executive Council a member of the Legislative Assembly who in his judgement is likely to command the confidence of the majority of the members of the Assembly.”

So that when the menteri besar ceased “to command the confidence of the majority of the members of the legislative assembly”, and this is borne out by his request to the ruler for

dissolution of the assembly under Article XVI, Clause (6), the ruler has the power to appoint another “who in his judgement is likely to command the confidence of the majority of the members of the assembly” under Article XVI, Clause (2) (a).

It is a personal discretion of the ruler to act on the appointment of a menteri besar. Since the ruler has the power to appoint another person as menteri besar in place of Mohd Nizar based on his judgement, there is, therefore, no need to order him to resign at all.

This is no more than a pretended show of power when, in fact, there is no such power.

And if the menteri besar delays the tender of the resignation of the executive council as required by Article XVI, Clause (6), there is Clause (7) which provides: “(7) Subject to Clause (6) a member of the Executive Council other than the menteri besar shall hold office at His Royal Highness’ pleasure, but any member of the Council may at any time resign his office.”

This means that the ruler can sack any member of the executive council or all of them at any

time.

In his book, ‘What Next in the Law’, the late Lord Denning wrote: “King James II was a bad king. It was he who favoured the Roman Catholics and was bitterly opposed to the Protestants. It was he who dismissed the judges.

“It was he who sent Judge Jeffreys on that Bloody Assize. It was he who directed that the Seven Bishops should be prosecuted for seditious libel – when all they had done was to present a petition to the king himself. It was the acquittal of the Seven Bishops that forced the King to flee the realm.”

It was a young banister called John Somers who drew up a Declaration of Rights. Although very junior at the Bar, he had made a short speech of five minutes which led to the acquittal of the Seven Bishops. Immediately after that trial, he was entrusted with the task of preparing a Declaration of Rights – to which the new King William assented.

This Declaration became the Bill of Rights 1689. It is not easy to lay your hand on any book which contains the full text of this great document. I will set out here a few of the principle clauses (for the present purpose I will only refer to clauses 1 and 2):

‘The Lords and Commons…

I … (as their ancestors in like case have usually done) for the vindicating and asserting their ancient rights and liberties, declare:

1. That the pretended power of suspending laws, or the execution of by regal authority, without consent of parliament, is illegal.

2. That the pretended power of dispensing with laws, or the execution of laws, by regal authority, as it hath been assumed and exercised of late, is illegal.

II … That William and Mary prince and princess of Orange be, and be declared, King and Queen of England…’

UK’s Bill of Rights

Macaulay, in his ‘History of England’ (Volume III) described the importance of the Bill of Rights in these words: “The Declaration of Right, though it made nothing law which had not been law before, contained the germ … of every good law which has been passed … of every good law which may hereafter, in the course of ages, be found necessary to promote the public weal, and to satisfy the demands of public opinion.”

If we are to have a new Bill of Rights, will it too be the germ of the law which, in the complexities of modern society, maintain the rights and freedoms of the individual against the all-powerful bodies that stride about the place?

I shall now return to the subject matter of this article.

I have borrowed the title of it from the second clause of the Declaration of Rights as drafted by the young barrister John Somers. Clause 2 reads:

“That the pretended power of dispensing with laws, or the execution of laws, by regal authority, as it hath been assumed and exercised of late, is illegal.”

The above quotation should serve as a fitting reminder that the laws of the land, more so the Perak constitution, should not be sidestepped by the ruler or, to quote from Lord Denning, by “the all-powerful bodies that stride about the place”.

If anyone thinks that he can dispense with the law for the execution of it, then this clause should remind them that the power to do so is only a pretended power. Article XVI, Clause (6) is what we are talking about here – the menteri besar should be allowed to tender the resignation of the Executive Council in due course of time without being hurried by regal authority exercising a pretended power.

The laws of the Perak constitution should be administered even-handedly and not unequally by giving the impression to the general public that preferential treatment was shown to some persons.

It is the appearance of impartiality that matters. It does not matter whether he did, in fact, favour one side unfairly. Suffice it that reasonable people might think that he did.

Substitute the phrase “by regal authority” for the phrase “by those in power” and we have an axiomatic rendering which applies to today’s modern society.

The executive branch of any government, be it federal, state or local, cannot ignore the people’s call for justice and fair play which throughout the ages have been “found necessary to promote the public weal, and to satisfy the demands of public opinion”.

The call of public opinion is a call to maintain “the rights and freedoms of the individual against the all-powerful bodies that stride about the place”. The executive branch of any government can ignore the voice of public opinion at its peril.

Unwillingness to heed the demands of public opinion can lose the mandate of the populace in the next election.

I think the writing is already on the wall. The demands of public opinion is a universal one. If the old order has been found wanting, it must give way to the new.

NH CHAN is former Court of Appeal judge famous for his ‘All is not well in the House of Denmark’ comment regarding judicial corruption. He was then referring to High Court’s commercial division which was located in Wisma Denmark, Kuala Lumpur. The quote is based on Shakespeare’s ‘Something is rotten in the state of Denmark’. Chan, who has since retired, lives in Ipoh.

(source: Malaysiakini)

Ini-mini-miny-mo!

The Umno Youth president post is indeed a hot one. Last night, the three contenders; Mukriz Mahathir (74 nominations), with Mohd Khir Toyo (62 nominations) and Khairy Jamaluddin (53 nominations) participated in a live debate on TV9.

It is interesting to note their respective answers to some pertinent questions of interest.

On ISA

Mukriz said he was in favour of using the law which allows detention without trial against those who pose a threat to national security and racial harmony. “When we allow people to hold demonstrations and protests without enforcing the laws, such as ISA, to control the situation, it will result in by-elections not going our way,” he said.

Khairy said he was willing to discuss amendments to the ISA, especially on the extensive powers given to the home minister in ordering the detention of citizens.

Khir Toyo, like Mukriz, took the hardline in urging for the strengthening of ISA but was quick to add that the government should explain to the public on why such a tough security law is needed. “The action from the government has been weak, for example the Karpal (Singh) issue. After more than 100 police report lodged, there is still no action taken. This has been a disappointment…,” he said.

On Teaching Maths & Science in English

Khairy was in favour of reverting back to Bahasa Malaysia as the main medium of instruction. “Personally I think there need to be changes because the effectiveness of the programme is not proven, especially in the rural areas,” said Khairy.

Mukhriz supported his father, former premier Dr Mahathir Mohamad, who implemented the existing policy. “I agree that ‘bahasa jiwa bangsa’ (language is the soul of the race), but we have to make sure we do not lose our competitiveness, not only against other races but other countries.”

Khir (sorry his response was not recorded by Malaysiakini)

Famous last words

Mukhriz promised to emulate the leadership qualities of his father Tun Dr Mahathir Mohamad who ruled Malaysia for 22 years.

Khir said Umno needs to return to the foundation which it was formed which is defending the Malay rights and Islam.“I am concerned that this Ketuanan Rakyat means Malays and other races, Islam and other religions will be placed on a level footing. The fact is Malays have a special position while Islam is the constitutional religion,” Dr Mohd Khir said. “Jika tumbang politik Melayu, tumbang la negara (Malay politics is backbone of the country). That’s why we are different from MCA, Gerakan and others,” he said. “The social contract is not unfair. I challenge those who do not agree to get into Parliament and change the Constitution then.”

“Do not think that the transition of power will solve everything. The transition is just like laying the foundation. Without reform, the transition will be meaningless,” said Khairy.

My 2-sen conclusion

Two of the three attributed BN’s lost in the last GE to street protests and said that ISA is important to curb these protests!

One defended Ketuanan Melayu , to regain the support of the Malays and possibly PAS??

CAN WE SINGLE OUT THE BIGGEST ENEMY HERE? NO PRIZE FOR THE RIGHT ANSWER!

SO IF YOU HAVE A CHOICE, WHO WOULD YOU CHOOSE?

1) The 22-year-old vomit, about to be regurgitated, for another 22 years of autocracy?

2) The leopard who will not change his spots no matter how many rounds of skin-peeling undergone? It’s also back to the same vomit.

3) The braggart  ladder-climber who hopes to take a short-cut?

(And don’t you dare say that this does not concern you… remember it’s always the Umno president who will become the PM!)

(source: Malaysiakini)

To ease our souls..

Today is a day of reckoning for Pete! And for most of us who believes in the freedom of speech and democracy. Let us take our minds off for a little while. Let us distract ourselves with these one-liners and jokes about politics and politicians, before we delve in the soul-less matters of our nation again.

• A President Prime Minister of a democracy is a man who is always ready, willing, and able to lay down your life for his country.
• A closed mouth gathers no foot.
• A crisis is when you cannot say “let’s just forget the whole thing.”
• A problem cannot be solved using the same level of thinking that created it. (In other words, if you screw it up, you can’t fix it.)
• Genius is 1% inspiration, and 99% perspiration.
• There are two things on earth that are universal: hydrogen and stupidity.
• There are two ways to slide easily through life: to believe everything or to doubt everything; both ways save us from thinking.
• Politics is supposed to be the second oldest profession. I have come to realise that it bears a very close resemblance to the first (prostitution)- Ronald Reagan
• Pick good people; talent never wears out.
• Please do not steal, the IRS hates competition!
• Doing a good job around here is like wetting your pants in a dark suit; you get a warm feeling, but nobody notices.
• Don’t be so open minded that your brain falls out.
• Definition of an elephant: A mouse built to government specifications.
• Crime wouldn’t pay if the government ran it.
• If you have something to do, and you put it off long enough, chances are someone else will do it for you.
• What do politicians and diapers have in common?
  Both should be changed regularly and for the same reason.
  (if you still did not get it, both are full of sh*t!)
• An honest politician is one who, when he is bought, will stay bought.
• Don’t be stupid. We have politicians for that!
• The word ‘politics’ is derived from the word ‘poly’, meaning ‘many’, and the word ‘ticks’, meaning ‘blood sucking parasites‘.

**********************

Letter To God

A little boy desperately wanted $100 so he prayed and prayed for two weeks, but nothing happened. He then decided that he would write a letter to God asking for the $100. When the postal authorities received the letter addressed to “God USA”, they decided to send it on to President Clinton. The President was so impressed and amused that he instructed his secretary to send the little boy $5. He thought that would appear to be a lot of money to a little boy. The little boy was thrilled with the $5 and immediately sat down and wrote a thank you note to God, which read, “Dear God, Thank you for sending me the money. However, I noticed that for some reason you had to send it through Washington, DC and, as usual, those bastards deducted $95.”

***********************

Defining Politics

A little girl went to her father and asked, “Dad, what is politics?” “Well, dear,” he said, “let me try to explain it this way – I’m the breadwinner of the family, so we’ll call me Capitalism. Mom is the administrator of the money, so we’ll call her the Government. We’re here to take care of your needs, so we’ll call you the People. We’ll call the Nanny the Working Class, and your baby brother, the Future. Think about all that and see if it makes any sense.” She then went off to bed, thinking about all her father had said. Later that night, she heard her baby brother crying and when she went to check on him, she found he had soiled his diaper. She then went to her parents’ room, but found her mother fast asleep. Not wanting to wake her, she went to the Nanny’s room and found the door locked. When she peeked in the keyhole, she saw her father was in bed with the nanny. She gave up and went back to bed.

The next morning, she said to her father, “I think I understand the concept of politics now.”

“That’s wonderful,” he replied. “Tell me, in your own words, what you think it’s all about.”

“Well,” replied the little girl, “while Capitalism is screwing the Working Class, the Government is sound asleep, the People are being ignored and the Future is in deep shit!”

(peng’s note: My apologies for the language used in this post, it is taken as a whole from the various sources, and maintained to keep the originality and the essence!)